the SNOW!! — Thursday, 03 January 2008

Hoping, hoping, the snow is finally coming. Out of the window, the world looks misty. All the houses, big and small, far and near, stand still in the dancing snowflakes. Always feel romantic when the air is full of snow falling or drifting. Especially when the dusk sets in and lights are on, the pool of dim light suggests a night of peace and quiet. I was on the way home at that moment, these sentences from “Spring” came into my mind all of a sudden. Isn’t it weird that I’d think of it out of snow? ^-^

The third day of New Year already, done nothing special. Still feeling “new from head to toe” though. Done the posting stuff for Nina; have met Rebecca & Gail; have got something from shopping. Just a usual day.

Had dinner at La Tasca with Rebecca in the evening. Didn’t realise that I’ve been here before with HIM till getting into the restaurant. Yes there’s always something to remind me the past with HIM. Sometimes it’s just impossible to let it go. Seems that anything might be associated with that memory. A small shop, a familiar picture, a DVD title, or when being asked about New Year’s Resolution today, anything seemed to be able to remind me the existence of that past I wish to forget. Sweetness, bitterness; bitterness, sweetness… The only way I can try to deal with the feeling of hopelessness is telling myself to believe that “time cures all”.

Alice told me in her email today – be happy. Yes, she’s right about everything she said about me. Be happy & make others happy. I used to be the one who always spread happiness to others; that’s the real me.

It’s new year’s time. Happy. Be happy.

盼望着,盼望着,雪终于来了。从窗口望出来,一切都雾雾的。远远近近的房屋,都在雪里静默着。一直认为,雪花总能让空气里弥漫出一种莫名的浪漫。特别在傍晚时候,归家路上,雪已停了。整个世界白白一片,加上路边一点点黄晕的光,不知为何忽然就想到那句“烘托出一个安静而和平的夜”。看到雪却想到朱自清的《春》,是不是特别奇怪?呵~

已经新年第三天了,并没有特别的安排;虽然仍然感觉到“从头到脚都是新的”:) 只是帮Nina去了一趟邮局,和DiDiGail小聚了一聚。对于shopping仍然是没有特别的感觉,倒是淘到一两样好东西,也倒没有特别的欢喜。

晚饭和DiDi去了La Tasca。进了餐厅才发现,原来是他带我来过的地方。忽然心里就万分惆怅,只好尽量告诉自己多想亦无用……其实之前被Gail再问到New Year’s Resolution时一种情绪就已然隐隐开始蔓延。有些东西,真的是很难割舍罢。毕竟是一段美好的过去,仿佛任何的一个小细节都能够清楚地提醒我那一段过去的存在。一家小店、一个小图案或是一张碟片上的名字,都会延伸到一段记忆里去。常常会感觉到无药可药,只能拿“时间改变一切”来安慰自己。

今天KaiKai的信里说,要学着乐观。其实她对我分析得非常准确,是啊,太容易受别人的影响,其实反过来自己也在影响着别人。

新年了,开心,要开心。